Sunday, August 17, 2008

The Trip

Perhaps I am an American abnormality, but I dread the thought of spending time in an airplane. Needless to say, the idea of spending 18 of the precious 24 hours in my day trapped inside one of these roughly suspended, speeding balls of metal produces another ball of metal in my insides. The thought of living in Taiwan was thrilling, even exhilarating. The thought of how I was going to get half way around the world, was not.
After saying our goodbyes in Virginia, we moved on to D.C. to visit the Taiwanese consulate. With our visas procured we tackled the frustrations of navigating our beloved Capitol's traffic system. It was great to once again see the sights that inspire patriotism in even the most apathetic of American citizens. The weather was gorgeous and perfect for taking snapshots. The parking, however, was any adjective meaning the exact opposite of gorgeous. I can think of a few special adjectives that would be most fitting indeed. Once we had worn ourselves out on the carousel of D.C. traffic circles, we settled into our hotel near the airport to prepare for our journey.
The next morning came far too quickly and before we knew what hit us, we realized it was our suitcase falling out of the truck at Dulles. We had arrived! Like good children we made it to the airport over two hours early to make sure we had time for the twenty minute check-in. Our airline helper, who shall remain nameless, graciously refrained from weighing our luggage claiming that we were "Doing a good thing over there". The next time they want to charge eighty dollars for having a fifty-one pound suitcase, I'm playing the "good deed" card. Three hours, twenty-one hugs, three snivels, and two quart-size Ziploc bags later, we were on our way to California.
Five grueling hours in the air rewarded us with Los Angeles, Spanish for something about angels, I think. Not sure what it has to do with angels other than possibly the fact that they work overtime to fly through the smog and protect people from paparazzi and a high crime rate. It didn't matter to me. I was finally in California. For some strange reason I have always dreamed of going to California. I'm not sure LAX fulfilled that desire, but it's a start. The terminal we landed in was unfortunately not the international terminal. A little hiking, some McDonald's, and another barefoot trip through security landed us at our gate. I still have theological doubts about the need for this gate to exist. It is not really a gate, but rather a portal. A portal into another world. A world of cramped, sweaty, jostling, bus passengers on the fifteen minute ride to their plane. See, apparently in California it is illegal to board an international flight, so they actually load somewhere in the Nevada dessert. Truth be told, it wasn't that bad and the end result was the biggest, roughly suspended, speeding ball of metal I had ever seen.
The previous comment was perhaps a little hasty. This was an Airplane. It deserves that title, all seven letters. Even economy class is stylish. I might actually like flying when I sit in a seat larger than a toddler potty and have my own interactive video, music, gaming device. They actually have camera's showing you the takeoff and everything below the plane. If you die in this baby, you can watch the nose hit the ground. (Provided you don't pass out first.) They even have a trip tracker that shows your progress and removes any need of asking "Are we there yet?". On top of all of this they feed you dinner and breakfast. You can't beat it. You actually don't want to go to sleep, which was probably a bad thing for me. However, the sundry devices kept me occupied and made the thirteen hours seem bearable. I am a little bitter that I didn't get to the end of Iron Man. I like that movie. Middle of Iron Man or not, we touched down in Taiwan, in one piece, still alive and I was never happier to see an airport.
The airport here was amazing. Very organized, very clean, and those little luggage carts are free. See what you have been missing? We had no trouble with luggage (Taiwan-4, US-0) and customs was no issue at all. We actually found Mrs. Chow and were on our way in no time at all. Taiwan was our new world, and it was amazing. Well, as amazing as anything can be in the dark...